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0 Relationship and marriage counsellor and CEO of BarJay Counseling Services, Counselor Esther Assana, has urged husbands to support their wives through intimate health challenges after childbirth rather than consider divorce.
Speaking on the programme “Let’s Talk” last Tuesday, she addressed concerns raised by a man who reported changes in his wife’s intimate health following childbirth. The man said he and his wife had been together for six years and married for four, and that he began noticing vaginal odour about five months after she gave birth.
Counselor Esther said the first step was to consider common contributors to body odour and basic personal care practices, stressing that women should pay attention to their normal scent so they can detect changes early and seek help when needed. “If it has just come, it means there’s a problem. That you shouldn’t run away from,” she said. “This is nothing to have divorce over, never. No, this is just an issue.”
She advised women to keep genital hygiene simple, including urinating and rinsing with water after sexual activity, and warned against relying on products marketed for tightening or altering the vagina. “Right after you’re done, get into the bathroom, pee, make sure you pee, and then wash it with water,” Assana said. “Let’s learn to just be using water. That is all.”
Assana also rejected the notion that childbirth automatically leaves a woman “loose”, saying the body is designed to stretch and recover, though some women may need exercises to strengthen pelvic muscles. She described Kegel exercises as a way to improve muscle tone, comparing the technique to the action of holding urine, and said women who do not return fully to their pre-birth state can still work on muscle strength over time.
She cautioned that inserting items such as herbs and spices into the vagina can cause complications and may lead to reduced sensation or unpleasant odour, adding that social media trends can mislead women into practices that backfire. In her view, frequent use of strong salts should also be limited rather than done daily, with water remaining the safest routine option for regular cleaning.
Turning to the husband’s role, Counselor Esther said marriage requires shared responsibility and support when health challenges arise, arguing that a spouse should not leave the other to handle problems alone. “When an issue comes, you don’t run away from the issue. No, you face it,” she said. “This is the time you need to stand by her as a husband… you have to come together as one family and fight this.”
